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Writer's pictureLinda Macelova

Creating Healthy Boundaries: Saying No When You Need To

Alright, ladies in STEM, today's topic? The constant pressure to say yes. We juggle complex projects, chase groundbreaking research, and fight to be heard in a sometimes unforgiving field. But in this whirlwind, it's easy to fall into the trap of endless "yeses," a path paved with good intentions but leading straight to burnout and career stagnation.

The Yes-Woman Trap: The Career Kryptonite

Think of yourself as a superhero, but your tools are your expertise and time instead of cool gadgets. Constantly saying yes is like handing out those tools like party favors. You end up fetching coffee, filling out endless forms, and taking on administrative tasks others could handle. Suddenly, you're perceived as a pair of helpful hands, not the brilliant scientist or engineer you are.

The Consequences are Real, and They Hurt Your Career

So, what happens when you become the office "yes-woman?" Here's a not-so-fun breakdown:

  • Leader or Lackey? Constant "yeses" make it hard to delegate and build leadership skills. You're stuck in the weeds, never getting the chance to strategize and showcase your vision.

  • Respect? Where's the Respect? Spreading yourself thin across administrative tasks makes it hard to become a subject-matter expert. People won't see you as an authority in your field if you constantly juggle non-essential tasks.

  • The Doormat Effect: Saying yes to everything invites people to take advantage of your time. Suddenly, you're not just handling projects; you're picking up the slack for others, further hindering your growth.

  • Party Favors vs. Power Skills: Let's be honest; organizing the office bake sale isn't exactly going to revolutionize your field. Focus on tasks that allow you to learn new skills, not bake another batch of brownies (unless that's what you truly love to do, too!).

  • Stress City, Population: You Saying yes to everything is a recipe for burnout. Juggling too many tasks leads to missed deadlines, frustration, and ultimately, subpar work.

Saying No for the Win: 3 Situations Where STEM Women Struggle (and How to Slay)

Here are some specific situations where women in STEM might find it hard to say no, along with some empowering scripts to flip the switch:

1. The Neverending To-Do List:

  • Scenario: Your manager piles on another project while you're already drowning.

  • Script: "Thanks for trusting me with this, [Manager's Name]. To ensure I deliver high-quality work on both projects, would it be possible to [suggest an alternative timeline/delegate some tasks]?"

2. The "Just One More Thing" Trap:

  • Scenario: A colleague keeps asking you for quick favors that eat into your time.

  • Script: "I'd be happy to help in the future, but right now, I'm swamped with [your project]. Would you mind sending me the details so I can take a look when I have some bandwidth?"

3. The "Visibility Booster" (aka Time Waster):

  • Scenario: You're invited to a committee meeting that seems irrelevant to your area of expertise.

  • Script: "Thank you for the invite. While I appreciate being included, I don't believe my participation would be the most valuable use of everyone's time. Perhaps [suggest a colleague] would be a better fit?"

Situation Guide for women in STEM

There are countless different situations that can be difficult to deal with and say no to in a workplace (and life in general). Get our FREE situation guide, "Ten Sticky Situations & Scripts for STEM Women: Mastering the Art of "No" (Without Burning Bridges)," and get ready for the most obvious. Remember always to adjust the scripts to your own needs.



Saying No is Saying Yes to Your Growth

Remember, saying no isn't being selfish; it's prioritizing your time and expertise for what truly matters. By setting boundaries, you:

  • Become a Leader, Not a Lackey: You delegate effectively and carve out space for strategic thinking, showcasing your leadership potential.

  • Command Respect: When you focus on your core skills and deliver high-quality work, you become the go-to person in your field.

  • Avoid Burnout: Setting boundaries reduces stress and allows you to focus on tasks that energize you.

  • Boost Your Confidence: Saying no empowers you to take control of your time and career path.

  • Become a Master of Your Time: You prioritize tasks that contribute to your professional development.

Saying no isn't just about work; it's about creating a life that allows you to thrive. Imagine the possibilities when you free up mental and physical space for your passions, hobbies, and relationships.

Ready to Master the Art of Saying No?

Saying no can be tricky, but it's a skill worth mastering. LM Consulting, led by career coach Linda Macelova, offers the Career Metamorphosis program specifically designed to help women in STEM build their confidence and assertive communication skills. This program equips you with the tools to navigate difficult conversations, set boundaries with grace, and ultimately, prioritize your career growth.


Through personalized coaching, you'll learn:

  • Effective Communication Strategies: Learn to say no politely but firmly, while maintaining positive relationships.

  • Time Management Techniques: Master your schedule so you can focus on the tasks that matter most.

  • Mindfulness Practices: Develop stress-management techniques to avoid burnout.


Don't let endless "yeses" hold you back from achieving your full potential. Visit our website to learn more about the Career Metamorphosis program and take control of your career journey. Book a free strategy session today and start saying yes to your future!

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